Since our head psychiatrist Dr Lecher Renfield has been diagnosed as a paranoid schizophrenic with violent, anti-social and psychopathic tendencies, he has a unique insight into mental illness that's unmatched by any allegedly sane medical man at any other asylum, hospital or loony-bin.

Our Esteemed Chief Enjoys Some Kind Of Relaxation Therapy. 

Here you will see clear proof that his reputation as one of the nations finest diagnosticians is truly well deserved:

Mrs BJ Writes:

My husband is a diabetic what treatment should he receive?

Dr Renfield Replies:

Such patients ought to be treated with Insolence at least 3 times every day.

Mr FU Writes:

I get terrible indigestion after meals, what can I do to stop it?

Dr Renfield Replies:

Try to masturbate your food more thoroughly.

Mr Anonymous Writes:

What are steroids?

Dr Renfield Replies:

They are things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Miss OK Writes:

What is an enema?

Dr Renfield Replies:

Someone who is not your friend.

Confused Anatomy Student Writes:

What is a 'Fibula'?

Dr Lecher Replies:

It is one of the smaller forms of untruthfulness.